The latest episode of Navya Naveli Nanda’s vodcast What The Hell Navya 2, titled ‘macho myths and modern men’ dropped on Thursday. In conversation with her mother Shweta Bachchan, brother Agastya and grandmother Jaya Bachchan, Navya discussed men and toxicity. When Navya brought up the topic of women feeling independent and wanting to pay for the food on dates, Jaya remarked they were ‘stupid’ to do that. (Also Read: Jaya Bachchan says bad manners in a relationship is a red flag: Have you ever heard me call my husband ‘tum’?)
‘How stupid is that?’
Navya was explaining how ‘after feminism and women feeling more empowered’ many of them want to do things independently. She said, “For example, today, if you take a girl out on a date and you offer to pay, some people get offended by that. Because women now feel they’re equally…” But before she could complete her sentence, Jaya chimed in, saying, “How stupid of those women. You should let the men pay.”
Navya continued, “No, but I’m saying these are things that happen. That ‘Oh we can open the door for ourselves. You don’t need to open it for us.’ So, where do you draw that line? Are you opening doors for people? Have you ever been in a situation where you’ve been chivalrous but a woman has said, I can do that myself?” Jaya chipped in again, “Basically what they’re trying to say is – don’t be chivalrous. How stupid is that?”
The intent matters’
But Agastya had a completely different take on it, explaining the difference between chivalry and toxicity, delving into why women felt that way. He said, “As long as you’re doing it to be polite, and not show ‘I’m the man,’ you can’t go wrong. If you’re opening the door not to be like, ‘i’m the one opening the door’ instead you’re doing it because ‘I want to help you,’ it’s never gonna come across the wrong way.”
He further explained, “If you want to say, I’d love to pay for this meal, it’s not going to come across, the wrong way because you’re doing it to do something kind. Not like ‘I’m the provider, so I’ll pay.’ It’s the intent.”
